Vulnerable

Vulnerable, I've found myself so vulnerable now
I’m naked and alone, yet I don't know how
Where did this feeling come from? When? Why?
Never before do I recall wanting to die...

Useless, yes that’s the word of how I feel
Everything here is just so surreal
That I cannot understand where is my place
And seem to walk at this…negative pace

Longing, I’ve been doing that a lot as of late
To the point that everything I have come to hate
Wishing now that for me there was something more
But…I had my chance, opportunity shut its door.

Never have I had this much pain and strife
To the point I wanted to end my life
But maybe, this is just some sort of phase
A reason to why I am in this continuous daze

Everything just seems to always be out of place here
And it seems all that I have worked for will disappear
I am lost shrouded with my before hidden thought
The thought that my sudden depression had brought

Rage is building up slowly yet surly inside my mind
And at some point I just keep hitting myself blind
I shut my eyes and ignore the fact that there is pain
For it is the only thing right now that keeps me sane

Am I ever going to become my happy self once more?
Or is that light of hope over there just one of those lures
The one that dangles right before my bloodshot eyes
And then ripped from me, for it is only pain in disguise

Bereft of beauty, that is what the world is to me now
To see happiness is something my mind won’t allow
For this is a world of great sorrow and eternal pain
To become myself again is something I cannot regain

Lowered to the undergrounds where feeling ends
That is where I shall begin to find my new friends
Even if they are not real, just figments of my imagination
It will just make it easier for me to reach my destination

Even now, you can feel the chill of hatred beside you
As you read, you know you will succumb one day too
Become vulnerable, and scared, lay naked with me
Maybe together, we will be able to set each other free